I have a friend who is nearing the end. We have been friends for about 23 years. It is so hard to see my friend's body failing, to see the resignation even if he believes that there is a life after this one and he looks forward to seeing loved ones again. It's hard to watch his body grow more feeble. It's hard to watch him walk and to watch his appetite decrease rapidly. I try to be careful in what I say so that he can maintain dignity. The other day when I visited, I asked if he'd like me to read from the Smithsonian magazine. I think he enjoyed the interesting topics, the vocabulary. Then we watched some little comedy show together. I loved watching him smile. What a dear man. He's 91. I can't imagine that the next weeks and month(s) will be easy.
Later. My friend died this week on Tuesday. Last Friday, I was at his house since I had forgotten my purse. He sat in his lazy-boy chair, clearly very tired and weak. He was alone and I got worried about him making it up the stairs to his bedroom. It was only 6 p.m. I encouraged him to let me help him up the stairs. He finally agreed. He stood with my help and used his walker to get to the stairway. Several weeks ago, my husband had come over and installed a handrail on the right wall so he would have two to help him the steps. Jeff also installed a metal hand grip in the door frame at the top of the stairs. My friend pulled himself up one step at a time. I stood behind him just in case. About 3/4 of the way up, he paused and said, "I'm so tired." He leaned his head against the wall. At last, he made it to the 2nd floor and used the walls to go down the hallway to his bedroom. I helped him onto the bed and lifted his legs for him and pulled the covers over him. I helped him with his medicine. He didn't have a phone in there, so I got an extra phone and hooked it up and posted several phone numbers where he could see it in case he needed it. I was sad to leave him but knew the medicine would help him sleep through the night. His final words to me were that I was an angel.
I'll never forget that. Ever.
He didn't want a funeral, so we will do our best to remain loyal to that wish though we are going to have a little fireside to honor him. One friend's idea was to hand out sticks of gum and lollipops to everyone at the end. Another friend's idea is to plant a Black Gum tree which will happen in the next two weeks.
Friday, September 26, 2014
Tuesday, September 2, 2014
What it's like to be a missionary mom
Our oldest son, Mark, has been a Mormon missionary for 14 months now. Mormon missionaries serve for 24 months. This is something we have looked forward to since the day he was born. Both Jeff and I served missions and we both greatly value the time we served. Serving missions taught us so many things that have had lasting value and given us great joy we had as we watched people accept the gospel. So, we were of course delighted as he prepared and looked forward to his own mission.
The departure date was far more difficult than I ever anticipated. It took me about 6 weeks before I could be unemotional about his being away. However, once that passed, I look forward every Monday to his letters. I feel that he is protected by God in his safety and health. It has been wonderful to watch his focus and dedication to the job at hand. He has worked hard and tried his best. That is a wonderful thing to see in a son. Mark's blog is here: Mark's blog
We have three more sons. I trust that they will all serve missions. It is such a valuable experience for a young man (or a young woman).
update: 3/17/17 Our second son, Paul served in the Arizona Tempe mission, Spanish speaking. You can see Paul's blog and read about his experiences. One thing I loved about his mission is that the missionaries got to use ipads for the first time and they were given permission to teach people using facebook. Paul taught people all over the world and some people even got baptized. I was allowed to teach with him so we often worked together to talk with people about the church through facebook. It was a really wonderful experience for me!
Now, our third son, Eric is serving his mission in the Michigan Lansing mission, Spanish speaking. He was sent to the Mexico City MTC for his language training, which was unique. You can read about his experiences here: Eric's blog. He will finish up in December of 2018.
The departure date was far more difficult than I ever anticipated. It took me about 6 weeks before I could be unemotional about his being away. However, once that passed, I look forward every Monday to his letters. I feel that he is protected by God in his safety and health. It has been wonderful to watch his focus and dedication to the job at hand. He has worked hard and tried his best. That is a wonderful thing to see in a son. Mark's blog is here: Mark's blog
We have three more sons. I trust that they will all serve missions. It is such a valuable experience for a young man (or a young woman).
update: 3/17/17 Our second son, Paul served in the Arizona Tempe mission, Spanish speaking. You can see Paul's blog and read about his experiences. One thing I loved about his mission is that the missionaries got to use ipads for the first time and they were given permission to teach people using facebook. Paul taught people all over the world and some people even got baptized. I was allowed to teach with him so we often worked together to talk with people about the church through facebook. It was a really wonderful experience for me!
Now, our third son, Eric is serving his mission in the Michigan Lansing mission, Spanish speaking. He was sent to the Mexico City MTC for his language training, which was unique. You can read about his experiences here: Eric's blog. He will finish up in December of 2018.
Piano Lessons
I am a piano teacher. I have been teaching since I was about 14 years old. I love being a piano teacher. I always get excited when the school year starts because I choose new repertoire and set goals for what I want to accomplish with each student during the year.
Today is the first day of lessons. At 6:45, I had a "first" lesson with a 7 year old boy. We talked about note names, looked at the keyboard, played groups of black notes, learned a couple pieces that he will practice during the week, wiggled our various finger "numbers" etc. The second student was an hour later. He is learning the piano so he can become an organist. This summer, he prepared a hymn and got to play it on the Mormon Tabernacle Choir organ in Salt Lake City, Utah. We discussed proper pedaling this morning. He learns quickly. One day, he will not pay attention to how many minutes are left in the lesson. I think I need to hide the clock.
Three more lessons today, new music, reunions after summer breaks. The next student today spent the summer in Greece and the other family moved to a beautiful new house. The three children seemed excited to see me and two had pieces they had made up. We wrote them down and recorded one of them that was most prepared and I encouraged them to enter them in the PTA Reflections contest. And then my son needs to find some time to practice too.
Ahh. . . music. :)
(later in the week)
Yesterday morning, I taught a little boy where his thumb was. He thought it was his pinky. It was so cute to watch him hold his fingers spread out and consider this new information.
Today is the first day of lessons. At 6:45, I had a "first" lesson with a 7 year old boy. We talked about note names, looked at the keyboard, played groups of black notes, learned a couple pieces that he will practice during the week, wiggled our various finger "numbers" etc. The second student was an hour later. He is learning the piano so he can become an organist. This summer, he prepared a hymn and got to play it on the Mormon Tabernacle Choir organ in Salt Lake City, Utah. We discussed proper pedaling this morning. He learns quickly. One day, he will not pay attention to how many minutes are left in the lesson. I think I need to hide the clock.
Three more lessons today, new music, reunions after summer breaks. The next student today spent the summer in Greece and the other family moved to a beautiful new house. The three children seemed excited to see me and two had pieces they had made up. We wrote them down and recorded one of them that was most prepared and I encouraged them to enter them in the PTA Reflections contest. And then my son needs to find some time to practice too.
Ahh. . . music. :)
(later in the week)
Yesterday morning, I taught a little boy where his thumb was. He thought it was his pinky. It was so cute to watch him hold his fingers spread out and consider this new information.
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